Welcome to the works of Jason D. Martin
Just before the big prom Alysa shares her feelings about her parents, her
friends, and how she thinks she's going to be treated at the dance.
Do you realize that tonight is the most important night of my life?  Oh my
God!  Do you?  It's like totally more important than cheer tryouts.  It's more
important than my first kiss, the first day of middle school, the first day of
high school, the first day of Driver's Ed, more important than my driver's
license, more important than any of my ex-boyfriends, more important
than my current boyfriends...  I mean friend.  It is the pinnacle of the high
school experience.  The prom.  Prom night.  The night that I will remember
for the rest of my life.  I spent six hundred dollars on my dress.  Anyway,
Jane Hickman spent a thousand...  She's a total daddy's girl.  For her
sixteenth birthday, her Dad bought her a brand new Ford Explorer.  For
my sixteenth birthday I only got a two year old Taurus.  Whatever.  Some
girls are just born with a silver spoon in their mouth.  She's such a snobby
little rich girl.  A little rich girl whose parents buy her anything she wants.  
Her parents have a swimming pool and a tennis court.  All we have is a
jacuzzi.  One time she told me she (
Makes quote signs with her fingers.)
liked my outfit.  She's such a snob.  I know what she meant.  She was
making fun of my new designer jeans.  She thinks they're out of fashion
already.  Slut.  Oh well, I'm not going to let Jane Hickman ruin the most
important night of my life.  My six hundred dollar dress is way more stylish
that that over-priced rag she's gonna' wear.  That little bitch.  That little
slut.  I'm gonna' be homecoming royalty for sure.  Homecoming queen!  I
hate Jane Hickman.  Hicky Hickman, 'cause she's always got a hicky on
her neck.  That little hootchie mamma better not be getting on the royal
court.  I'd just kill myself if she was homecoming queen.  I'd kill myself!  It's
bad enough her dress cost more.  It's bad enough she's got a newer car.  
It's bad enough she's got a pool and a tennis court.  I hate my parents.  I
can't believe you're related to my Mom.  She's so lame.  At least you have
money.  We sure don't.  Why don't we have a pool and a tennis court?  
My Mom is so lazy all she does is sit around at the computer.  My Dad's
never around.  He's always at the (
Makes quotes with her fingers again.)
office.  Whatever that means.  Like if he was at the (
Makes quotes one
last time.
) office, he'd be making money right?  Well, maybe he needs to
get his butt in gear and get his daughter a fifteen hundred dollar dress so
she doesn't look like a bag lady at the prom.  That's what I'm going to look
like.  A bag lady!  Jane Hickman is gonna' be prom queen for sure.  This is
gonna' be the worst night of my life.
Monologue from
When it Rains Gasoline
by Jason D. Martin